Alcoholics Anonymous

Today I had the opportunity to attend a local Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. No, I just didn't decide to go. In fact, it was a class assignment. Needless to say I was very nervous and apprehensive about the experience. I had no idea what to expect and to be honest I was -in many ways - scared. How would they feel about a nursing student attending their meeting? Would they be upset? Or would I be able to blend in? Would I have to talk? Would they single me out? Would they be mad? Would they be happy? I just had no idea what to expect and the unknown was wrecking my nerves.

First off, let me tell you the first thing I noticed: if you aren't an alcoholic or if you've never been an alcoholic you AREN'T going to fit in. It’s as simple as that. It’s not that they all looked the same: they didn’t. There was a range from those business-dressed to those that looked like they couldn’t afford any clothes at all. In fact, I was amazed at how many homeless find their way to AA every week. But it wasn’t the clothes that singled me out: I simply couldn’t fit in because of my face. Those recovering addicts wore something on their face that I didn’t wear…and I really couldn’t put my finger on it at first. The only thing I knew was that I just looked…different. It  wasn’t until the end of the meeting that I realized these people wore hope on their face.

I don’t want to get much in to the specifics of the meeting. I found the meeting to be kind of, well, sacred – and I don’t want to ruin that feeling for me. I will tell you what I did come out of there with though – I came out of there with so much respect for these people. They appreciate every day and live their life with such belief and conviction. Why don’t I live my life that way? All of them attribute their reverence to the twelve steps of the program and to their recovery. Maybe some of you are familiar with those steps, but I never was. I found myself reading and re-reading the twelve-step plaque on the wall. Let me tell you something – we might not be alcoholics, but if EVERYONE followed some of those steps the WORLD would be a better place.
Steps 2-11:

WE:
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.